I dont envy anyone!!

I have heard a lot of people say that they ENVY something or someone.(mostly someone!)
Even I used to feel envious of many people but suddenly when I read this at my friend's page something made me uneasy.
She has a great family and she had written a caption under a pic which shows a happy family together as "I envy them".
And it hit me, why should she ENVY those ppl? its after all an artificial ad while she has a real solid and a better family for herself. Maybe she didnt get the meaning of the word envy but I learnt a lesson that moment.
I have everything in my life that I can possibly wish for(almost everything) and I absolutely have no reason to envy anyone. If I dont have something that someone else has, well then its what differentiates me and that person. Its me and entirely me and there is no point envying about anything or anyone. What we have might be hundred times better than that "envied something".

ps: one of my friends had wirtten in her blog, "Just like my name belongs to me, my stupidity, kiddishness and insanity belongs to me" and yes all of us have our fair share of ownership. Its what defines us. Lets be proud of what we are!

My W.O.R.L.D

Now that I'm into my course completely, getting lil time to do other things but today I made time to write this post because I wanted to boast to the entire world that I've got one person in my life who is simply E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G to me.

Wondering who that is? well.. Its my mom. My mom. THE best mom in the entire universe.!
Daily I pack my breakfast and lunch to college as I usually have a long day in college. Mostly I eat whatever my mom prepares and give but sometimes I'll miss taking my lunch cause of various reasons ranging from being busy or no hunger to a crave for eating hot food(this reason is of course very rare for the sheer reason that if i have to go to canteen, I'll have to climb down three floors and again back and in that hunger that will look like climbing Himalayas.)
Usually this crave for hot canteen food will corrupt my mind when my lunch box has these greeny goody vegetables like brinjal or beetroot. Yesterday was one such day when my lunch was some rice with brinjal and I had this crave for the hot hot sambar rice of my coll canteen(it will be yummy!). I went to canteen and had a superb lunch and as a result took back my tifin box unopened back home(trust me I had plans to eat it sometime later but somehow it dint happen :( ).

And my mom saw the box and she happens to notice it everytime I take back my lunch(Hark my luck!). Yesterday she saw it and she got so angry.My mom has this ability where in she can be very cool about what happened and completely make me feel like I've committed a murder and squirm with guilt. Yest this was the cause for the dishoom dishoom between us. She declared that she will not pack me any lunch from now on and that I can eat daily in canteen.It ended up with my marching into my room and burying into my laptop as though I've a never ending college work. She didnt kandufy me at all which irked me even more. Well, I was actually hungry but I was so angry with my mom that I just drank the milk which she gave(I mean she kept in the table- I assumed that it was for me!! :P) and slept hungrily.

Today morning, I woke up late(She didnt wake me up!!) and hurried to get ready to college and I saw ONE neatly packed tiffinbox in the table instead of two. It completely put me off. I didnt think my mom would really do what she said yesterday. I got so upset and angry that I left to college without even telling anyone at home that I'm leaving. I dont like such kinda mornings when I dont get to talk properly to my family. I scowled all the way to my college( I guess I scared a couple of ppl. I reached college and put my mobile inside the bag in a huff and didnt bother with it.

After a break around 10.15.AM(My coll starts at 8 AM), I checked my mobile and found 1 missed call and 3 msgs. I couldnt believe my eyes. THREE MSGS from my MOM! My mom never msgs for the simple reason that she doesn know how to. She would rather call and even if I send a msg to her, it would be ME who reads that msg of mine after she returns back home in the night. She had sent three msgs to me.
1. "Did you eat breakfast?"
2. "Call me during your break"
3. "Dont miss your lunch" followed by a missed call.

HUH.. Well. I choked. Thats my mom. I'm fairly sure that her morning would have been even worser than mine and nothing, I repeat, NOTHING would have made my mom send msgs to my mobile. Its just the love she has for me. I called her during my break and she broke down when I said that I had my breakfast. Silly her!!

I've realised umpteen times that my mom does everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, just for me. Only me. She made sure that I had a life that any girl would envy to have. She cared without being suffocating(I know people who complain that there is no INDEPENDENCE for them in their house and that their parents are over protective). She gave me all the freedom I wanted and has drawn no line that I've to stay within.
She has her own way of making me feel guilty. If I dont score marks, she will be the first person who cheers me up saying that there is always the "next time" which will make me feel guilty that I've let her down.
YET, she has brought me up with fine qualities. I cant remember her raising her hands on me. Actually she never has. Not even a light pinch.
Moms are very sharp and living proof is mine. If I make a mistake, she would act as though she didnt notice it until I realise it myself that I was wrong.After the enlightenment that what I did was wrong, I would go tell her that this happened and I'm sorry and she will wave her hand with that easy smile, perfectly knowing what happened. It would amaze me to realise that she had known it all long and yet she had kept quiet giving time for me to learn never once telling "told you so". Honestly she rocks.

But inspite of these realisations, I've raged at her for the smallest of things, let her do all the work when I could have done(well its not exactly my fault- whenever I get up to do any work, she says its over and then what am I spsd to do?!!). I've pulled long faces when she had scolded me and a lot of other things which will make me look like a heartless daughter!

It would be an understatement if I say that I adore her. Its like her that I want to be, some ten years down the lane of my life. Someone who my daughter(or son) could be proud of.

The 'other' side

HEAD of a coin:
Scene: Marina Beach 4th january, 5.P.M

April was sitting quietly in the beach looking at the people around her. She was down.Her blue dhuppata blew on her face and she let it. there was no reason for her feeling blue.She watched the waves and tried to cheer up.


There were a lot of romantic couples holding hands and enjoying the waves.

April noticed a tall girl in pink top, walking along with her guy, his arms around her shoulders.The girl looked happy and the guy looked like he was in deep thought. Probably wondering how best to propose her, April thought and sighed. She had always wanted to be tall but she just wouldnt grow an inch taller than 5feet and thats it. Now a days all the guys are over 6 feet and she looked really small near them. she had wished n number of times that she would be taller than what she is now.

Then there went a pretty girl with short hair which she had colored a dark brown and it looked wonderful with the light blue sky and water and the breeze.April turned her gaze to the guy walking next to the pretty girl.He was looking at that girl sideways admiring her and April sighed once again.
April had long hair which is mostly a mess when exposed to wind. She had wanted to cut her hair short but her mom wouldnt hear of it. "I cant even let it floating and it takes time to plait" she had complained to deaf ears.

A couple passed in front of her and April heard the heated voice of the girl "So you want me to be like her is it?" And she saw the guy look towards April and give an embarrassed smile and put his hands around his girl to comfort her and spoke something. She seemed to calm down a little and even gave a lil giggle. She was wearing a threefourths cowboy pants and a short top and looked pretty. April could bet that the guy was very lucky and he wouldnt even glance at other girls. she had never been able to wear three fourths and she had always wanted to. When she could have worn, she was not allowed, and now it wont fit her figure. She resented it.

A couple came and sat down few yards from her. They seemed perfect. The guy was handsome and the girl was fair, tall and had the right structure.She wore a red shall around her neck. They sat looking out at the sea. They were eating a bhelpuri and kept talking and laughing.

April turned to look at the setting sun which has almost disappeared into the sea. And it hit her. She was dark and she hated the most about herself. She would not talk to people immediately and not go to any parties because she had this complex that she was dark. She had tried a lot of creams without any effects.
She had had enough dosage of the "blue" feeling and she wanted to go home. She got up and slowly made her way through the sand aware of her sloppy steps. She had never learnt to walk in a straight line. She zigzagged her way and finally jumped down from the wall and walked back briskly.

TAIL of the same coin:
Scene: Marina Beach 4th january, 5.P.M

She was wearing a new pink top which fit her perfectly. She was going to the beach with her guy and she was thrilled about it. It was their first romantic outing. He put his hands around her shoulders and she felt so happy and started talking to him.
He was not listening though. He was trying to work out how to remove his hands from her shoulder. She was tall and it was not easy to remove his hands without much efforts and grabbing her attention. He had always wanted a girl a bit shorter than him who would fit in his shoulders perfectly. Like the girl who was sitting in the sand looking at them.
****************
They had argued on phone and to make it all up he had agreed to take her to beach. She had cut her hair short and dyed it brown two days back and he had hated it.She previously had a wavy black hair which he admired and now he was unhappy about it.She had insisted that this would give her a "cool" look but he thought it gave her a cheap look. He missed that long black hair and he looked at her sideways and seeing past her, he saw a girl in blue dhupatta with a long black hair flowing till her hips.He wished she hadnt cut her hair.
*****************
"whats wrong with this dress? Everybody envies it and it fits me perfectly." She sounded exasperated. Her guy replied "It looks too fit on you that it shows off your every curve only too well honey. Girls can look beautiful wearing salwar or saree too. Look at the girl with blue dhupatta. She has got all the essentials and she looks beautiful in that traditional dress." "So you want me to be like her is it?" she stormed with rage without glancing at the girl he was pointing. He was emabarrassed for the girl in blue dhupatta was watching and she was stunnigly beautiful with that quiet look. He then took his arms around his girl's waist and murmered "If she can look that good wearing that, I am sure you can look ten times better in it sweetheart." she giggled and they walked away.
****************
She pulled her brother to come to beach for she was feeling bored. He finally consented and they got a bhel puri and settled in the sand looking at the waves. There was a beautiful girl sitting and he had fought with his sister to sit a few yards near that girl and her sister had teased him."Come on beauty has to be appreciated." he chided. She gave this pouty look and said "She is not even fair."
"Fair? Thank you, I wouldnt look at a girl who looks like a Pomeranian dog." he shot back at her. "You say I look like a dog?" she fumed. "Nah, not a dog, but a Pomeranian dog." he pulled her legs and she pinched him and they both laughed.
***************
Two guys were playing cricket in the beach sand and they stopped to let the girl in blue dhupatta pass. She was walking dreamlike in a strange zigzag way which kinda gave her a "cool" and "carefree" look. They watched her for five mins and returned back to the game with difficulty as she jumped off the wall and disappeared.
***************

Refreshing!!

Hav you ever watched an ad and felt yourself slipping into its joyous mood no matter how deep down in the dumps you feel? This ad is one. Its pure magic and you will automatically smile when you see it. The lite mood of the ad captures the essence of Limca (I dont know if the drink is effective but the ad surely is).

The music, the voice, the lyrics, the concept (splashing water and playfulness after a hard day’s work)- everything is wonderful and leaves you with a feeling to go out and splash water.


Lyrics:
Fuhaarein, bochharein, nazaaare chura lo na,
kuch boondein chura lo na;
Thaki si zindagi se, ruki si zindagi se,
kuch lamhe chura lo na…;

Kuch yaddein, aur sapne, apne chura lo na;
ooo Ruki si zindagi se, thaki si zindagi se,
raftaarein chura lo na…

lukka chupi khelti hai,
bheed mein hazaaron kaliyaan (hazaaron kaliyaan);
mmmm galiyon mein yun bheed banke,
chup gayi hain saari khushiyaan (saari….saari khushiyaan);
Khushiyon ko bula lo na,
muskaane churalo naaaa…
sulagti pyaas hai toh,
machalti pyaas hai toh;
ek limca churalo na.

Kuch yaddein, aur sapne, apne chura lo na;
Ruki si zindagi se, thaki si zindagi se,
raftaarein chura lo na…”

And so stand stricken, so remembering him!

Time Does Not Bring Relief; You All Have Lied

Edna St. Vincent Millay

Time does not bring relief; you all have lied
Who told me time would ease me of my pain!
I miss him in the weeping of the rain;
I want him at the shrinking of the tide;
The old snows melt from every mountain-side,
And last year’s leaves are smoke in every lane;
But last year’s bitter loving must remain
Heaped on my heart, and my old thoughts abide!

There are a hundred places where I fear
To go,—so with his memory they brim!
And entering with relief some quiet place
Where never fell his foot or shone his face
I say, “There is no memory of him here!”
And so stand stricken, so remembering him!

"Love" - defined

Love is not what happened when our eyes met first,
Love is not what I felt with your first touch.
I knew it was love when...
..my heart cried seeing you unhappy,
..my heart danced seeing you smile,
..my heart sang at the mention of your name.
I knew it was love when,
..I felt lonely if I did not see you for a day,
..I got the courage to stand up against the world to be with you.
I know it is love when I leave you realizing that you love me not anymore.

Read this when I was vetti browsing the internet. It was anubavichu posted by someone in her blog.
Followup link: http://sanmad.blogspot.com/2006/10/love.html

First day special

Yesterday I attended a program about Ten commandments to follow to make the first day of an employee in an organization a memorable one. The program started at evening 6 and the speaker's booming voice woke everyone of us who were comfortably sleeping after a long day in class.

"So how would you like your first day of your first job to be?" the speaker asked.
Not many hands rose for everyone in hall either still managed to sleep or were thinking of a proper answer. Finally one girl rose to the relief of everyone else(for they can now go back to sleep).She replied " I would like to enter my office to a round of applause and it would be great if they introduce me like very intelligent person joining us... great honor n bla bla" The audi broke into laughter and everybody was now awake imagining their would be first day in their first job.I thought of something like wonderful office, all smiling staff, a great infrastructure and finding an old friend working there and a HOT BOSS!!! The speaker's voice cut me across from taking my imagination any step further(I had a vague image of how HOT my boss would be!!)
He then showed a video which was all about the checkpoints to make a memorable first day(an employer's perspective).Everybody settled back to continue their nap. The blissful period lasted only for 20 minutes:( The speaker(a approx 40 odd yr old bald man who has about 15 years of industry experience. He had so far switched about 7 jobs)then reminisced about his first day- the reason why I am writing this post.
His first day was whacky I guess. He had joined an Ad company early 1950s and they had welcomed him cordially. He was asked to remove his shoes outside the office and was ordered to offer prayers to the "creative" department. When he came out after offering prayers, the shoes were stuck to the ground(??!!). After a struggle to remove, he had escaped to the restroom where he had the biggest dilemma he had ever faced in his life. The restroom doors were labelled "THEM" and "THOSE" instead of "GENTS" and "LADIES"!!!!!!! Well yeah. I never found out if he managed to get into the right room. :p

A year later, when he was in the team to welcome freshers, they had gotten even more creative and had designed fake food coupons of OBEROI hotel(early days when photoshop was first introduced). The appaavi freshers had taken those coupons to the hotel and what was more weird was that the hotel had even accepted them. WOW!! (of course this company's manager had immediately called up the hotel and apologised and asked them not to accept these vouchers!*sigh*)
What a day those freshers would have had!! I personally prefer that "them & those" idea better..!! :)

So first day in the office, I now wish, that it is something whacky like this instead of a boring or over sweet introductions but i doubt if any corporate will ever take time to make any first day of any employee memorable. So much for the program I attended!

If u have patiently read this post I would appreciate if u can share your first day experience or your dream first day with me.. :)

PS: I would also appreciate if someone can enlighten me about that "them" and "those". It would be highly helpful for my future reference!!