Damn those tears!

Hey,

I was wondering whats wrong with me, so hoping this post would clarify a few finer points that I'm unaware of today.

Have you ever cried? Ofcourse I'm not asking about how you cried when you were a toddler and you cried cause you could not stand.

No. I'm asking if you have cried being fully aware of why you are crying and what made you cry.

Yeah, we usually cry when we are sad or frustrated that nothing is happening our way. In other words, when you are feeling helpless. Totally agreed.

Why else do you cry? One of my guy friends told me he cried the other day cause Arsenal lost (or did it win?) I dont know for he would have cried for either of the reasons. I heard a lot of people say they cried on seeing Master Blaster finally hit his 'ton'. Yes, we feel 'tearful'(we dont call it crying if its for a happy reason) when we are happy. 'Happy tears' it is!

So now, the real reason for writing this post is to find out how many of you cry because you are angry.

I do and I want consolation that I'm not any strange species or alien creature. Its very annoying to find yourself in tears when you want to stamp and rage and there comes this whole lot of tears and you give everyone the impression that  you cry to get your way! Its bloody annoying.

It happened the other day when I was incensed about something that the company did to us(lady employees) and I was trying to tell my boss that its not fair and if something can be done about it. To my boss(and mine) intense embarrassment, tears welled up in my eyes. My boss was like giving me this pitiful expression and told me he would see what can be done(as though talking to a victim) Come on! the last thing I wanted was that. I was arguing my stand and I wanted to shout, forget my tears, just listen to what I'm saying! I really dont know if its normal to cry when someone is extremely angry. I was totally and justifiably angry that day and tears spoilt me from expressing the rightful anger.

And the funny part is, once the crying is done with, I feel less angry. Its like the emotion 'anger' has let itself out after a good dose of crying. Sometimes I dont want to let the anger out because I want to let others know that I'm angry that something happened (or didnt happen) to prove my point.However, I end up shedding those dangerous tears and with it, all the anger. So I dont bottle up my anger. I know thats good for health but its not so when you have to establish a presence for you and you want to be heard for the right reasons.

So I decided to google out the answer and I found out that (to nobody's surprise) women cry on an average 64 times a year when compared 19 times for a guy. Mostly the reason is sadness (Although every site that I read mentioned that women cry for no reason apparent or to put it in another way, they cry to get their way) and loneliness or helplessness. A few mentioned happiness and very few mentions of anger. A lot of sites mentioned what one should do to 'not cry'. Somehow when I'm angry, I cant imagine myself taking a deep calming breath in front of my boss or an irrational person behind a sales counter so I dont end up having angry tears.

So, I dont know. Crying does make me feel better in some ways but most of the times it comes in the way of making someone see my point. If you are reading this and come across me in tears please dont feel sad for me for I dont cry much cause I am sad. Its 8 to 10 chances that I am simply fuming inside and I'm extremely angry. And do let me know if you have experienced this and if you have found ways to avoid the tears.